LGBT Friends, Could You Please Comfort Me?
Question by Wisdom: LGBT friends, could you please comfort me?
This happened four months ago… and I am still devastated by it… I hope you will bear with me as I tell you a bit of a long story…
I’m gay, and I was with this guy for about one year…let’s call him RI. From the beginning, I knew RI was an alcoholic, bipolar, and liked to smoke marijuana often. When he met me he assured me that he would stop and that he would never disrespect me, especially after the horrible substance abuse I’ve seen in my own family. For some reason… I was very attracted to him…and being the hopeless romantic that I am, I believed him. I was so blind…
The alcohol was killing RI. He craved alcohol so much that his mother would call me constantly and beg me to get him to calm down. I would skip class just to go take care of him… And for a while he responded to me. But his cravings did not stop. I begged him to stop drinking and I would hold on to him and do anything I could to keep him calm during his cravings… The cravings continued and got worse. He threatened his parents, and threatened to drink vanilla extract to get his fix. And then I came to the rescue once his parents got on the phone and told me what he was doing…
Let me make a long story short… I am against alcohol abuse and drugs. But seeing that there was no way out, his parents didn’t want to send him to rehab, and because marijuana seemed to comfort him and help him….I changed my mind… I convinced his parents to allow him to get a medical marijuana card, I set up the appointment, I bought him a $ 300 vaporizer so he would not smoke it, and I bought him $ 100 worth of the stuff… I expected it to last… He assured me that he loved me. He vowed to be with me always. He…got on his KNEES so many times and promised me to “trust” him and “give him the benefit of the doubt.” But in the end….when he wanted to get “f*cked up” at the PRIDE parade, I begged him not to. I told him how much that would hurt me to see him stoned out of his mind.
You see, RI would use it to take himself from reality so he can “deal” with his problems. It has ruined his relationship with his parents, his sister, his friends (except for the ones who support his addiction), and many other people who tried their best to help him. He told me that it is “amazing” to (this is a direct quote) “get f*cked up” at PRIDE, and that “if you don’t like it, then don’t go”. And then he started hysterically crying as if I hurt him by asking him to do something for me… I will never forget those words. I told him that I did not accept the fact that he wanted to get intoxicated around me, especially like that. He left me, saying that I was controlling him and his marijuana usage. I will admit….I constantly expressed concern over his abuse of the substance….but I always supported him no matter what. I loved him so much…
I feel SO STUPID and worthless for putting myself through this, and it has sunk me into a tremendous depression that is taking so much out of me…. Please, don’t post any hurtful comments… those the last things I need right now, thank you. Let me know your thoughts please. *hugs*
Best answer:
Answer by Jheri E
YUP
Answer by M.Y.
you need to drink some chamomile tea. It’ll calm your nerves. I drink it every day now and I don’t get anxious or depressed anymore.Sorry about the relationship. You could of offered to have went with him to AA meetings or something. But this is in the past now. Just settle down with a cup of chamomile tea.
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